3 weeks to go....

I feel SO discombobulated & the most inadequate of our team.....3 are 'younger' & single, our pastor has a grown dd then there is ME. I've still got 3 school age chillers....for starters...Parts of me still thinks this makes absolutely no sense....that whole 'why me?' idea I guess.

It's not a 5 hour lay-over in London...it's 10! We fly from LAX, departing 4:30pm on Sunday June 15, arrive in London 11:30am (their time) Monday & our team separates there. (impossible tickets!) 3 of us hang out in London for the day! Sounds fun...kind of! lol Then we leave 9:35pm & arrive in Ethiopia 7:30am Tuesday morning!

We'll be together for the flight back. Due to the timezones, we will leave Ethiopia Friday June 27 @ 4:30 AM & arrive back in LAX by 7:30PM the same day! LOLOLOLOLOL

That's REAL time travel!

Increase my faith Lord!

Oh my WORD!

The airline tickets have been ORDERED! This is for REAL & it's exciting & scary & exciting & scary & did I mention EXCITING...& SCARY!!!!

I planned on going to turn in my passport application first thing Monday. I got my passport pix & then it was too late. NBD! Go first thing this morning. I was all ready, had all my paperwork, pictures, ID, birth certificate, money & my 'number'---you have to take a number.

As I was sitting there @ the post office, checked over all my paperwork, reading the fine print...I looked @ my birth certificate, & realized the version I had really gave NO personally identifying info. hhhmmmm???

NUMBER 4!

My turn. I go up to the counter & it is a different woman than I got the number from. She said 'uhoh!'. That couldn't be good. Yep! As is typical for MY life, the birth certificate was not appropriate.

Off to the county registrar recorder to get a full copy. The line wasn't too long. I hoped I'd be done in time to return to the post office. Plus now there was this extra BC fee I wasn't planning on having to pay...

Well, PTL! I finally got to the window & in less than 30 seconds, the clerk took the BC I had in hand, printed out my complete one & I didn't even have to PAY! cool!

It was too late to go back to the Post office by then...so first thing tomorrow......

I do have another prayer request though...I called my health provider to make an appointment for my required-if-you-leave-the-country-shots & you have to leave a message for the 'travel nurse' & the message says they will call you back WITHIN 2 WEEKS! What? I heard one of the medications you have to take for 3 weeks PRIOR to leaving. This is serious stuff so...please pray that they will call me back to make an appointment like YESTERDAY!

Where is my life & what have you done w/ it?

EVERYTHING I thought my life would be is NOT!

Not.even.close!

I would have, could have, WAS, happy to be "JUST" a SAHM! Although I resent the implication of ever being a JUST anything. iykwim.

But it was fine w/ me. I would make my own adventure. I loved my life. I loved to imagine it was the glorious 1950's I lived in. lol

The biggest change of all? The most insane thing ever?

I am going to ETHIOPIA!

What?

I thought missions were things for singles, couples or people w/ NO children. God has been challenging ALL I ever thought about everything & MY role within this life.

Missions IS something I have always been interested in, if you can call it that: an interest.
Why? I don't know. Is it my sense of adventure? What? Is going w/o running water & actual toilets considered adventure? Is it some inner desire to get away? I think I can imagine nicer places to 'get away' too, right?

I need to fund raise. Travel is not free. Anything over & above trip expenses will be donated to the native churches we visit. I need to get a bunch of shots & a passport. Hiking boots, light weight rain coat/poncho, travel toilet paper, cargo pants.

It will be the HIGH rainy season, downpours in 80 degree temperatures. No running water, toilets, much less hospitals. No complaining, whining or crying allowed. Period. We will be escorted by 2 armed guards. There will be virtually NO communication 'home' for the two weeks we are gone. No telephone, cell phone or net access.

This is insane. I know. And I WANT to go w/ every part of my being!!!!!

Is THIS the journey?

A couple weeks go @ a morning service we've been attending regularly for about a month....2 members went around & prayed for each person, prophetically or encouragingly, however the Lord led.

When they got to me they shared a few words then also said they saw me w/ a 'backpack' going on a 'journey'. Being the type of person *I* am, I wondered if the backpack was a burden. lol

Then they prayed for JOY....but the woman came back w/ a puzzled look on her face, The Lord gave me a sword for you? The other woman said she sensed it was a rod...@ the same time we both responded that it was like a walking stick.

I had an image of myself hiking up a mountain or on a trail, w/ a back pack & a walking stick, heading towards the giant sun in the sky & once I reached the summit, was awe struck @ such an amazing view.

Another interesting point is that my Dh was not w/ me but rather off to the side w/ the ktbunch, his arms around them protectively as they were watching me.

I pondered on this for awhile, not knowing what to think....thinking the worst, of course. My DH wondered if I had a walking stick BECAUSE he was NOT w/ me...

Then....I was 'invited' to go to Ethiopia! Was that the journey we all saw as they prayed?

I can only wonder & step out on faith. It makes no logical sense. We cannot even pay our own bills but yet I am going to go on a endeavor that requires so much money. Would God really want me to fundraise for this trip while my utilities get shut off?

It all makes no sense...leaving my family, missing my 2 littles birthdays....why ME? Don't get me wrong, I truly, really want to go. I imagine it will be the adventure of a lifetime. But is it appropriate? Is this desire within me (that even DH recognizes, I've always had) sincere?

I DO realize & admit, that now, I feel like I actually have something to offer. I have learned so much in regards to my personal relationship w/ Jesus Christ...it's everything else in this world that confuses me, such as MY place in IT!

I want to share this amazing Love & Grace w/ any & all who will listen. I know I have changed & been healed & released of some oppressions I did not even realize existed. I have had a serious life transformation.

I am being challenged & learning so much. I feel like all the dots are starting to connect...why did it take me 35 years to get here?